lonely

So my wife went out of town this weekend to a women’s’ retreat and I am home with the kids. While this might seem like a recipe for disaster it actually has not been that bad. I am home with them a lot and so there is nothing I can’t do. For the most part they have been pretty mellow, but a couple of times we have had some issues. Eli has been a bit sick and so he is a little more challenging lately, and Maddy, well, she is Maddy, and thinks she is in charge. All in all it has gone well with the kids.

The thing that I did not expect was how lonely I would be. I miss Brandi so much. This is only the second night, but I am dying here by myself. I thought that it might be nice to have some time alone. I figured I could play playstation without being nagged, and eat whatever I wanted, but the truth is that I miss her badly. I didn’t even play video games last night (ok well not very long). I mostly wrote because I didn’t know what else to do. I have too many writing projects as it is, but I thought of a great new idea for a book.

Speaking of books, I got my check for last quarter and it turns out that I have only sold like 100 books. Pretty lame huh? I don’t despair however. I truly believe that the book is good, and people who have read it think so as well, only marketing is a challenge. I did manage to get onto a morning TV show here in Fresno which was great. Several people said they saw me, so that must mean that many more saw me. I only hope that such exposure leads to more sales. I understand that it may take some time to get my book out, and build an audience, only I thought that it might be easier than this. Then I think so what? So what if The Sureshot doesn’t sell a lot? I will write another book and then another, and perhaps one day, I will sell some books. For now I am simply thrilled that I got published at all. If I only sell 100, well that is still more than most people ever sell, because most people haven’t written a book, and more still haven’t been published. For now I will just be happy with that.

Besides that I can’t wait for Brandi to come home tomorrow. It is strange how you can grow accustomed to living with someone, that when they are gone, everything seems so strange. I didn’t expect this feeling, but now that I know it is there, maybe I will appreciate her more when she is around, (which is most of the time). They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, after this weekend, I believe it.